Pieces

I'm such a coward nowadays. For a fun fact, I've had my so-happy-without-stress- days and sadly it's over now and I'm now trying to get myself ready for hard days. To be honest, I'm afraid, of almost every single thing.

What I am feeling inside is like pieces of a puzzle, life puzzle. There should be part of my study, my family, my social life, my passions, and also romantic love. As I'm now a college student, I have bigger and more responsibilities, for myself, my family, society, and God Almighty. 

I've been living these 17 years, I'm not mature enough, but I've grown up. I'm no longer a high schooler, I'm a college student. The 4 or 5 years in front of me will define my future, my dream future. I was a girl with gradually-changed attitudes (sometimes, not in the good way). And yes I've learned a lot of things, precious times and lessons. I dream, always. But, I'm not blind. Sometimes, when I dream too high, I fall as soon as I finish drawing the dream on my mind.

Somewhere on my mind scratched words like, "Yes, my future is bright and I will be the blabla, I will blabla, and my blabla will be like blabla". Then my heart shouted, "Make changes starting from your messy life, then. Stop dreaming but realize that you're living in reality. Come on, go get what you want".

A friend of mine texted me while I was laughing over Raymond. I told him that I was afraid of facing reality. I helped him going through his little wreck and to help me he said this, "Like what you said, Nad. Enjoy every little second, huh. You will miss 'em someday".

I'm now trying to get into it, face it, and do it well...