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What stemmed from a childhood game that I used to play combined with the surroundings of my darling girlfriend's neighbourhood and her own memories made me write a film called 'Note of Love', a film that ask if a 6 year old can comprehend love and maybe so much more so, than we agenda filled adults.So after the story was set in white bleached flattened tree pulp...I set out to make my film. After crafting out the scenes, I went to find the locations, the neccesary permits and the camera, cast and crew.

The Time and Place
On the 5th of December up till the 10th December, I shot the film in PJ old town. It's very much a tribute to the place to...in all it's dirtiness, in all it's derelict, there was this charm of a town where people lived and grew...where dreams started...My dear camera assist looked and me and actually said, we can't shoot...there's too much garbage strewn around....I was telling him...that's exactly the point...not everything needs to be model like beautiful...sometimes strewn garbage(now I am not advocating littering) weaves a beautiful tapestry.

Ambitious Project
It is my most abitious endeavour yet. From firemen to create artificial rain to a camera used by george lucas on shooting episode 1. I decided to pull all the stops...why? we should put money where our love and believe is no? I was nervous and anxiety filled from the onset but I tell myself that...I can and will...I can and will....

The Cast
Many says don't work with animals or kids...I had 5 of them...all around the age of 6.You know what? Many was wrong...despite some minor mood swings and temporarily stopping productions, the kids were a joy to work with. They truly touched my heart even as I looked through a small black and white viewfinder. Imagine the emotions blown up to a big screen...they'll blow people away....My actress, a budding dancer studying in Singapore named Alice (who was reccomended to me by her friend Trina) was also both gorgeous and alarmingly lovable despite being a little blur...she doesn't know mattel's barbie's ex was ken and pubic hair is not the term for the hair you shave off your chin...but no matter, guys will swoon for her when this movie is out.

The family
A terrible tremble...I've spent alot of money on this film...will this work out? will it be a disaster...schedule change,last minute cancellation by actors,a fishshop that changed his mind about letting me shoot.... The feelings I felt on bringing this film to life...fluctuated from near heart-attacks to moments of absolute bliss with the cast and crew...where smiles and well wishes were evident all around...but this is the organic way in which a film is created...an organic ever changing and magical process, in the midst of it all I am sure the term family found.

Postscript
There's still two more additional days of shoot required to finish this film that'll hike my cost further and though much less stressed...I still have to gear up for it....but seeing the visuals I've shot...not to be vain...not by my merits...but by the merits of all who were on this film...I feel the film will be a nice gentle touch on one's heart...exactly what I set out to do on my Note of Love.


If any of you remember me making a post here looking for young boys to act in a film…well…I have been away as I have been working very-very hard fine tuning that film’s script and so far a lot of people whom I have entrusted to read the script as panelists said wonderful things...

…the approach for the quaint feel is good –
Vinsen cinemaonline boss…real world businessman


…touching, though I find it quite hard to believe someone can fall in romantic love at the age of 6..
Rebecca, student and dreamy storybook reader


…good script…now it all depends on how you film it…
Lishen, works in publishing gay man who blogs at jessism.blogspot.com


Yes, they may be trying to cheer me on but I did tell them to be honest…brutally…

But there is still a lot of work to be done…final selection of locations, shots wanted, equipment required and what I can afford…working on a low, low budget as sponsors didn’t want to support the project even though they thought it was a good project…to quote one sponsor in verbatim…

Maybe we will give it a pass this time…You do have the talent and the persistency and you will definitely score…..i am also confident- identity to be left anonymous

Well, one day they’ll support me…and when that day comes the amount will double if not triple because my production scale will go up !

One sponsor actually made it very clear to me why they don’t sponsor…it’s not that they don’t believe in the project but marketing people like brand managers who approve sponsorships… work for a regular pay…they engage an agency to do most of the marketing work and from there…they just tick off on approved agency projects…and should any project fails, they are allright because the agency was engaged by the company, not them…but should they decided to sponsor me…they are putting their heads out on a chopping board…they are trying an untested and untried route…if it succeeds, well good…but they are unlikely to receive any bonuses…however if it fails…they’ll land in hot hot hot soup…so why take the risk and put yourself at a limb? Why not take the safe route and just earn the regular salary? I completely understand this as part of the process but what I didn’t appreciate were company that beat around the bush before giving me the no…thanks to the few that really considered but gave a a straight no…

so yeah…with every rejection a lot of dissapointments and heartaches but well it’s part of my trials …1000 bad bulbs before osram rite? :P Well I am bursting through my bulbs…and would get to the thousand soon…

That’s moviemaking for you…deep downs but also with it great ups….And it's important to have great ups...make sure you balance your deep depression with a good feeling of tipsy high sometimes...

today…I had a surge of happiness exploding within me…I…I … I was swept by what I think I’ll call a sudden well of personal inner joy. It was a wonderful feeling and although alone and having been awake the whole night…I dropped a disc into a CD tray, turned up my hi-fi, sang my hearts out and dance in my most awkward manner myself…sounds crazy…well who cares…I have an overwhelming feeling of happiness! Hahaha. I finished personally drawing the storyboards for the entire film…working every scene out in every detail…what angle I plan to make and how I see everything…

I am very happy with what the film look like on paper myself and I am trying to enjoy myself as much at this moment…soon the quiver inducing process of putting it into camera starts…two weeks to complete preproduction and soon time will come when I ‘ll be painting with my camera…and nervously, I try to hold my brush steady to make a beautiful picture…pray for me or wish me luck…I need all of it!!!
Frogcroaks



Finally I posted my first video online....and finally there's a real frog croaking on thefrogcroaks.blogspot.com...This is a painted frog or also known as a chubby frog (Kaloula pulchra), one of the four I have in a 3 foot aquarium they share with two green paddy frogs. They've been around as pets for two years already(if you check, they appeared on pictures in my blog way back in January 18 and 27, 2005) and I love them the most, amongst all my other frogs because they are non-aggrssive, give me the most pleasure in observing and children simply adore them. The don't jump as much, but they can jump quite a distance when they want to...them charging up first by tensing all their muscles before a leap and landing with a plop is hillarious.

As I am writing this, a friend told me that she is scared of and doesn't like frogs...I think that's a great misconception. Frogs are nice and they don't do anything wrong. They are not dirty and 'being ugly' is often a matter of personal taste. Hey, ever thought that they may not think much of your looks too? I have seen 'loving mothers' beat to a pulp a frog that was unfortunate enough to hop into the presence of that...that... more accurately described as horrid beast of a woman.The irony is...that same horrid beast of a woman would later buy a golden plastic frog to place on a shelf to better the feng shui.I wish she gets reincarnated as a frog so some other woman can beat her... :P

Frogs are generally harmless and handling them probably pose more harm to them than you.Our skin are thick so germs probably can't penetrate and it'll be okay if we just give our hand a good wash after before eating anything or licking our fingers in weird fettish. For the frog however, our rough and warm skin can hurt their smooth wet skin and disrupt their cold-blooded system. Touching a frog probably feels like the reverse of having a doctor's cold cold stethoscope pressed on your warm chest...and now imagine if that stethoscope is larger than you...it'll be quite a shocker no? So do run your hand through some tap water and cool it down before grabbing a froggie friend...

...If you are thinking of starting a hobby keeping frogs...i wholely encourage it, as it will better your understanding of them,animals and nature. But please do care for them properly and be whole-hearted and commited as a petkeeper. Don't neglect your pets...they are living animals capable of suffering.If you ever give up on your hobby..be kind enough to bring your froggie to a clean stream for him to go back into the wild or call me up and I'll do it for you...don't just chuck him in a clogged polluted drain.

For more info on the care of painted frogs check out
www.amphibiancare.com/frogs/caresheets/asianpaintedfrog.html


click on image for larger view of montage



I always wanted to make films and i am happily on my direction there(to be a fully estalished filmmaker able to tell any stories of my heart) Along my journey, I once worked as a wedding videographer for couples to earn my keep while persuing my still distant dream.From weddings, I honed my skills till i was an event videographer and from there I hopped over to corporate video and commercials. So it was quite an irony(coming full circle?) when i directed a commercial over the last weekend that required me to set up and shoot a wedding scene, the concept being the product is so good, you'll want to marry and fully commit to it!

When i first heard the concept over the phone, my first reaction to it was ??? then hahaha...but then i thought the corny idea actually posed a welcome challenge for me to test my skills, as in what can i do to make the idea workable and do what it is suppose to, sell the cosmetic product.

So there are two ways to go about it...one, go all out tacky like the gatsby commercial with the clapping hair which i simply adored...or go neo-realist as in try to make it as real aside from the slightly fantastical idea...I decided the later. I threw out a church wedding as one, the limited budget doesn't permit a large number of extras and if I wouldn't be able to fill the pews of an entire church and thus lacking the scope defeating the purpose of a church.I decided and sold the idea of a small wedding...a modern garden one beside a pool of japansese carps...that way the location lends to a beautiful imagery and also limits the number of extras I need to make the place look filled up. I used a jib and a track to make a descending and reversing camera to capture the best man's(who people will mistake as the groom) smile before slowly going back into a full shot with dropping petals, cheering friends and the bride standing staturely in the middle of the screen.

I had wonderful extras who applauded wonderfully and on cue. And God was kind to give me good slightly cloudy sky lighting that wasn't too harsh so I only had to add a little bit of light to compliment the look for the first shot.

The second shot was just as easy but huge sheets had to be stretched across the pond this time as we were dropping confetti from above and we didn't want any expensive japanse carp to devour and die from it requiring a cost in reimbursing a fish. It was quite hard to stretch the big piece of plastic over the pond with strings...my crews didn't want to jump right into a pond. I was so wanting to just jump into it and do it while enjoying the swim inside but as a director overlooking everything I can't...ah well....

So here are the screenshots of my latest work...(not the full commercial the opening and closing shot)leave a comment on what you think? the bottom pic is a shot of the entire production crew and talents.



walked a stubborn goat, brought a fussy cat to the vet, cycled around her neighbourhood picking wild berries,

the following is an excerpt from my previous blog on Sept 04....
I was actually queried...walked a goat? wild berries?
Well...Yes and yes...here are the pictures...
goat and wild berries...believe it or not...they still exist!

click on picture to enlarge...zhiling at custom checkpoint KLIA

It's been almost two weeks since Zhiling left for the states(21st August).The first two days were brutal...as she was on a flight and was uncontactable...i could only send my thoughts and wishes to the stars hoping that feelings can fly through the air and go fast enough to chase after a jet. When she finally got there and had the opportunity to call me i missed the call, cause I was in the cinema...and when i got news from her dad she called...I run out as fast of the cinema to call her back.Unfortunately, all I got was an answering machine as she was already in part of her orientation programme.

Honestly i have to say I miss the hugs, cuddles and kisses...but the relationship is going well. We exchange daily reports on email and lots of IDD phonecalls and have so many photos that physical touch is the only depreviation and if I can't live without that maybe I am just plain old 'ham-sup'(horny). But in short, I am happy as it seems like absence makes the heart grow fonder applies for us rather than 'Out of sight...out of mind'

Some of my friends say that long distance is hard...and if can go through...sure married one...well...errmmm....hmmm.... :)

Zhiling and I had a wonderful year together...in fact she left exactly a year after we first met.We were a couple after three months. Yes, many say the first year of a relationship is the sweetest...as the honey coated moon ferments and sours after that but honestly I really feel me and zhiling can be very happy together...we do have our misunderstandings which we call our 'knock head' moments but generally we do yearn for one another.

On my dates with zhi...I honestly rediscovered my childhood as she gave me a homelife...something missing in my relocation to KL city in persuit of my career.
With her, I have swept floors with panache, wash dishes with glee(dear...no this doesn't mean i wash all the dishes or sweep floors after we marry) eaten dinner with her family while watching her dad and grandma bicker on whether the soup is salty enough, walked a stubborn goat, brought a fussy cat to the vet, cycled around her neighbourhood picking wild berries, jungle trek in the rain and an assortment of genuine fun.

On my vacation with zhi, in barely a year we've covered kinabalu, redang, mallaca,ipoh and kuching, sarawak. We do alot of silly stuff on our travels.In redang we walked half way round the island at night and slept over at a beach chair at some other hotel before coming back in the morning...boy, were the hotel attendants at the place where we staying pissed...they thought we had died when our friends informed them that we never got back from our walk...in pedas,sabah...we realised that water rafting was not as fun as capsizing into the rapid and bodysurfing downstream...so while our mates stayed on the raft, we both fly off at any opportuinity...plop into the water together...experience a moment of darkness and sheer disorientation before finding one another's hand in the water...holding one another and re-emerging with a huge huge smile on our respective faces...in ipoh we got another reluctant to get wet couple(our friend and tour guides) into the water sat together in a waterfall just holding one another...

One tyre puncture, once out of petrol.Yup me and zhi were stranded by highway twice...and you know what...crazilly enough it was laughter all the way...at ourselves...at how silly we are...even though the puncture resulted in a missed flight.

No, we were not rich and many a times we travelled counting our budget...but it's the little stuff that were wonderful.Take cinema going for instance...we realise that it's much more fun to be both sharing warmth under a single sweater rather than wearing one each...so we thought why not bring a blanket to the cinema? And so we did...everytime.the ticket cost the same...but it was nice to hold her hands and rest our heads under a blanket and a movie.

Zhiling cannot be more attractive in the morning with a cranky'why do i have to wake up?' face, puss in her eyes, hair all tangled and with a sniff, a scent of sourish sweat .. but seriously...I almost don't want her to wash it off. Not that my fettish is unkept unwashed just awoke girl but it's nice to have someone so how you'd say...special in an ordinary way...but no...we don't sleep together...zhilling has her 'tight conservative code of i am cina and cannot until marry'. So it's on the floor for me or in her brother's room. But I do get a reward for sleeping on the floor...very early in the mornings i ussually get invited to hug her tightly, share kisses, sniff her hair and sometimes just lay together in a light sleep cuddling for an hour to two before we awake to greet the day. It was sheer bliss...but once...her dad walked in to wake her and i was like errmmmm....errmm...in a spoon position with her.No we're not naked...but I was still so afraid..I lay completely still pretending to be dead asleep...nothing happened.phew! :)

Zhi also needs lotsa coaxing before kisses but once entice...she'll kiss.Telling this to a friend...who sleeps over at her bf regularly she says...eh, all these are suppossed to be highschool fun and discoverieslah...I beg to differ...it's alot of fun as it is at my age...

But yeah...beside a recent rough patch...this pixie is very special to me and i do believe that the long distance will do us great. We have alot to catch up when she get back which will give us many stories to share...we will also also have time to grow without distraction from one another so that we can in turn enrich each other upon being reunited...

The last night I spent with her at her house...helping her tidy up her computer files...then her bedroom clutter...hurry I'd say as it's already two and her flight is at seven am. Please give me more time to sort she says saying that she's going through clearing what's really sentimental to her more reminiscing than sorting.

Yup, we have alot between us to reminice about too... we walked round and round the airport together like silly trying to dry tears after our 'goodbye, see you in two years'... before walking back to her parents...and so it came time...the last i saw of pixie was her waving at me from the passport checkpoint...

Well...I'll see her in two years tops...or maybe sooner if I can save enough to fly there for a holiday...now i am just hoping that no blonde guy with a thing for pixies comes near my pixie...

Yesterday...I couldn't reach her by email or phone...her area was hit by the tail end of a hurricane hitting the east side of the US...and sometimes ya...it's hard when you want to reach someone you care about for your own selfish needy reason when she's abroad...so all i can do is send my heart...

Dear...I love you.


Was on set for three days in my home state Sarawak to see the shooting of a friend's film 'Possessed'. Very excited anytime there is anything to do with movies and my hometown so here are the first picts from the film that will release in cinemas this november....if you like what you see...go get your tics!!!!!


my darling took ages to do this photo montage and upload it on her blog.... :P
but it's nice and i guess i put it here too.

















In the commentary for the movie Eve and the Firehorse, the director Julia Kwan said she doesn't actually feel deserving of giving a commentary; this being her first film...I beg to differ...

Watching weird unknown film titles used to be what I do. Going and hang out at my local video rental show and browsing through titles picking anything up...the weird the unusual especially was a habit. Anything that catches my eye...and because i 'allow' myself to watch movies without big stars or big media hype or even hype in the artistic sense... I do sometimes discover absolute gems...but nowadays I hardly have time to watch films and thus my film watching diet has reverted to those movies in the cinemas with my girlfriend. I stopped buying dvds as I was pilling up on alot of DVDs that weren't getting into my player as is.

Yesterday though, a film caught my eye...it's called Eve and the fire horse.I picked it up.A most astonishing synopsis, it says it's about a little girl who tried to undo her mother's run of bad luck by going to Jesus and because her family is buddhist; the mixed understanding of religion results in an amazing fantastical religion of her own..I paid for it in an instance and was watching it immediately upon reaching home.

It was a most wonderful film...at first very subtle but with a beautiful imagery that shows alot of life's small details and chinese cultural elements in a Canadian migrant setting.Elements that I do see around me and often take for granted...elements inside a film was suprisingly beautiful and I sat with the wonder following eve's eye on things as if admiring everything again for the first time.

The film also bewildered me in it's treatment of religion. And it said so much without saying and asked question which gave me answers...if you get what i mean. Answers I can't define but smile knowing at heart...I guess a better explaination is visual cues brought up knowing/feeling something unexplainable that's not even existing in thought.. but feelings were provoked.Especially scenes treated with ambiguity in surrealism...this scenes were bewildering to the emotions.

Surrealistic scenes where Jesus danced with Buddha and where a goldfish sung karaoke.How these happened? Watch and see...It is unbiased towards christianity though it did tackle it head on with a child wondering why grandma pours tea for a God never thirsty? A nun saying that buddha isn't a God and Jesus is the one true God, a child defying her parents believe in Buddha to a buddhist mother saying it should be okay for my child to believe in christianity...afterall, another god means more 'protection' for her daugther rite?

If you loved Joy Luck Club, this is about in the same league genre-tically but in a much smaller and much more personal perspective of a little girl with a dose of religion.A wonderful gem of a film that leaves me so refreshed to thoughts and to go out and actively finding gems films again...

alot of people i know first ask who's the star and says eee...must be boring when I reply that there are no stars...allow yourself this one treat of a movie please...
I have been baptised a Catholic at birth and had my first holy communion at the age of 17. In highschool, I have been part of a group called YCS (Young Christian Students) which I am proud of till this day. I taught christianity to kids at camps and sunday school,simple stuff guided by text books and reciting prayers which i did sincerely in the hopes of giving something back.

Now I do sin, sometimes conciously (mostly being a guy with impure lustful thoughts) sometimes unconciously (getting angry and disrespectful to my parent over misunderstandings). I sometimes feel really unworthy of being Christain, I sometimes wallow and hide in the guilt of it...

Honestly, my faith is hitting an all time low but truly I still do believe in the Lord and want to better myself again religiously. I want to be able to be happy and right with God,honestly who doesn't?

My brother,a stout Catholic and previously an altar server have accused me of being a hype-Catholic, one who gets fired up to go to church every now and then but not having the commitment to go every week."You were going to church everyweek when you were in YCS because you had friends then you stop...you were going to church every week after the film passion of christ...then you stop again....what's wrong with you?" Honestly, my immediate reaction to this is anger...but upon reflection, I am thankful and believe he is half right. Yes, I do need to get fired up at times to go to church...but then honestly...in my lapses,I do still crawl into church now and then kneel extremely humbled and low at a corner to pray..." Lord...please make me a better person and please lead me to a better christain life...I want to make you proud of me..." Honestly...the Lord often rejuvenates me and I walk out with a tinge of happiness and all sorts of ideas come to me as to how to improve myself and the world around me but all to often...this sudden thirst to improve gets quenched in a busy busy world.

I come from a Catholic family, one that used to hold hands and say grace before meals...'used to' as in the tradition stopped after my grandmother's passing.But recently, during a Chinese New Year dinner, we did it again. My family is quite funny.In church, we do not sit as a family... Take for example, my brother and I,my grandfather, my dad and my uncle. We could go for the same mass and yet my grandfather will sit at one place while my brother another while my father and uncle at another...I once tried to sit at my grandfather's side only to have him drop hints to sit elsewhere next time. Does this mean that as a family we like to seek God in self and the solitute of it? Or does it mean that my family has not grown together in God. My family can also all go to church together...say wonderful things like peace be with you and then come out of church bickering about one another and the state of affairs.

When I met zhiling, she brought me to her church at Glad Tidings. One of the reason I loved her dearly was because when she was beside me in church singing, she turned into this most beautiful being. All happy with a huge smile singing her praises. This gave me sort of a revival again to be one with God...and I was at one point attending one service(in Glad Tidings) and one mass(in St. Ignatius) every week. There were obvious differences in the two but I wanted to be with her and sing praises but I also wanted to hold strong to my Catholic faith.That is not saying that the protestant way or any other religion whether Buddhism and Islam is wrong, just that mine is Catholism.

But then again,I had a friend tell me off...how can you profess to believe in Jesus being the one true God and still allow other religion to manifest? We must evangelize!

God...guide me?

Over the next few postings I am going to post openly and honestly on my thoughts of God and christianity,please contribute your comments...I am hoping this will lead to a greater understanding for me on God.



Last last week. Zhiling and I broke up. But what caused the breakup? She said on breaking up with me she’ll always love me….which confused me more…so why the breakup?

We were compatible and had no personal problems, we enjoyed each other tremendously whether on holiday trips, house chores like cooking, on email or doing her homework together…the situation was I have an ex-girlfriend who is quite helpless at times and me being quite the soft hearted person, I never hesitated to help her. Pixie was generous and was okay with me helping her as a friend, but my ex was jealous and mean to pixie so pixie often felt hurt (for those of you who know my ex, please help her and be a friend to her). That aside, I was putting God aside in part of my life thinking I’ll get religion back after I’ve worked out my career. Pixie always told me these things are hurting me and disappointing her…I was just so preoccupied by life and work that I didn’t heed her advice to improve myself and the position I am in thinking I’ll do it someday…So she decided to break up with me with the hope of me seeing my flaws.

When our relationship was all gone, I went through all our pictures, emails and was just swept by how important she is to me. I was in pain as I loved her so and having to put away all our stuff as we are no longer together brought more than a tear to my eye. How could I have hurt someone I love so much… unknowingly by not doing simple pleasing things that actually better myself and keep her. Why didn’t I notice these things until I lost her? I guess its part and parcel of forgetting what’s closest to you…

I asked her lets not end the relationship on a sour note as ours but give me one more outing with her and end it on a sweet note….at first she was reluctant and said only if one of her friend come along so I said, honestly I want to have you back…but if I can’t, I’ll really withdraw. She agreed….I examined myself closely and made notes to change...I painfully compiled a scrapbook of all the pictures we took together realising even more how much I do want her; I cut my hair, bought flowers and a parting gift for her. Then, I went over to her place early in the morning and helped myself into her house as her sister was on her way out of the gate to school and made her way to her room. I awoke her like I always do by gently combing her hair…and then I gave her the flowers…she smiled…I then grabbed her hand and put it on my hair…she smiled bewilderedly…I sat on the floor next to her bad and we talked for hours...as she looked through the little scrapbook…in the end of the book I asked if she’d be my girlfriend…because the first time she asked me and claimed it wasn’t official till I asked…I never did ask so we couldn’t have broken up…so…zhi will you have my hand to have, to hold and to love…my heart was beating furiously…she said yes…

I am wrong….but I am glad, I was able to get what meant a lot to me back…. That afternoon,we were dating in the most romantic place in K.L., JPJ headquarters Wangsa Maju, as pixie had to make her international driving license...I am smilling silly…she is too…she said she is glad that I realized…and that she never stopped loving me…I guess the lesson is sometimes we should not take what we have for granted…especially love and always do our best for our love and emphasize it in our lives as much as or more so than what many of us choose to emphasize on; money and career…


Pixie is still leaving for the states…and in a week I’ll still lose her…physically she won’t be next to me for the next two years…but I’ll have her comfortingly at heart and I think for that, I am already blessed.She is seating infront of me right now...she hasn't bath or change clothes since she awoke and she has just spent quite awhile in the kitchen preparing lunch...she smells...very nice...

Thanks to Sze Hui and everyone who gave an ear and a shoulder...


linus .. linus .... i'm feeling rather calm with a fuzzy feeling inside me... asking myself am i crazy or not crazy? but i'm gonna trust my heart... and it says u're someone very special to me..zhiling 9th november 2005

On 9th November last year...a beautiful pixie fell in love with a very lucky froggie and they became a couple.Froggie is very sad to say that Pixie has left froggie on the night of August 3rd 2006 ending our relationship....Froggie was very sad the whole of today and did what any grown man would do....pour over old pictures of himself and pixie, hug a pillow and cry. A frog's gotta do what a frog's gotta do.

Froggie may try to appear funny but froggie is very sad.Henceforth, the shoot of froggie's next short film slated for next week will be push back three weeks...froggie is in no position to shoot a love story for the next couple of days.Tears corrodes celluloid.

On August 8th 2006, Froggie went to pixie's friend's place in cameron tower supposedly to fetch zhiling home...then pixie sat froggie down and said she's decided...pixie then sent froggie home...sad froggie walked in the cold rain from taman tun to cameron towers in gasing with the hopes that this crazy deed will win pixie's heart again because froggie and pixie always do crazy things......upon arriving at 5am, froggie has to sit outside for two hours in the cold waiting...for pixie to wake up...pixie didn't care to see froggie...pixie's friend tried to send froggie off with a security guard...froggie says please...I love pixie...just give froggie one more chance to see and talk...if she asks me to go I will. Pixie asked froggie to go. Head held low...froggie left...his world in shambles.

Froggie is very sad...and is trying very hard to win pixie back...but pixie wouldn't return froggie's call,sms or emails...even when froggie showed up infront of pixie's house, froggie only got to talk with pixie's dad...not pixie.Pixie first saw froggie at starlight cinema...it is very sad that froggie wouldn't get to go with her this year...

Next day froggie receive this email...

I'm truly sorry that i have to do this. but it do not nessasary means an end to our relationship. please understand that the time for an 'us' is not now.zhilling

Froggie did nothing wrong,neither did pixie.... it was just a situation that's too long to explain... it came as a shock...

Dear zhiling...

I love you...I thought we are stronger than this...you said to me at the start that "I only date if it leads to marriage" I immediately said okay and promised you that I am committed to see this through...even through long distance as you will be going to the states...and now...you walked away...I am sad but I wish you every happiness....you did say hopefully one day we will be again...well hopefully...but for now I am heartbroken and sad...Dear,talk to me....you always said one of us must always save the relationship when the other breaks...I am trying dear...

...it was a wonderful journey and I hope that I have brought you the joy and happiness you've brought me...I'll miss you...

I wish you a good trip to the USA dear…go with God’s blessing and come home safe and always be happy cause that’s how you’ll always be remembered in my heart…hopefully not for the last time dear…I love you…thank you for everything…

Dear...I will not call to disturb you...but am still here sobbing...please call me if you change your mind...

Linus
Looking for young children wanting to learn to act between ages of 8-10. Must be sporting and willing to jump over small drains etc like kids of yesteryears.Ability to speak hokkien is a plus.Need 5 boys,two girls.For a short film by Linus Chung.Also looking for people too free willing to work on this project for experience.call me.012 9331415


to enlarge photo montage click on image



On a holiday trip back to Sarawak with pixie…my 21st birthday present to her, she remarked that she wants more adventure, walking halfway around the circumference of Redang barefoot at night wasn’t enough(more on this anthr blog) …so I decided to head out to Bako National Park.

The trip start with first a drive out to Bako village where you jump on a 15minute boat ride…the boat cost RM 40 but it can be shared out by 5-6 people. It’s a very serene boat trip, hardly bumpy and the blue scenery-scape is awesome, Mount Santubong fuzzy on the distant horizon with an endless blue calm sea with a little drama, fishing posts
sticking out of the ocean breaking the silence of the image. Then as we arrive at the mangrove swamp where we jump off onto a jetty…the familiar creaks of the wooden planks lining the jetty and the walkway welcomes you on your holiday. The walkways leads to the park HQ where you have your simple sovernir shop, the administration, the canteen and not forgetting the various accommodation chalets. It’s like a little village and I ran through the trees like a kid to mine…honestly, I was expecting much much more rustic that what I got upon arrival. Though the Holiday Inn regular may complain, those for the adventure will find facilities on Bako more than adequate…luxurious even. An added plus is that you don’t have to pay holiday inn prices…coke is RM 2 lunch is RM 5

“Oh my!” pixie says to me as a wild boar walks pass us. Yes, just outside our quarters, semi detached lodge A, a wild boar happily roams free as if a resident jester while camera click away. Nature is close by…we saw silver leaf monkeys, proboscis monkeys, kingfishers and monitor lizards barely a hundred steps from our quarters too.

A moments rest and then it’s time to go on one of many trails that makes bako…well bako. A map provided upon check in is quickly referred to and off we go. There is no need for a guide as the park ranger did say that Bako is one of the hardest National park to get lost in though one season pro did get lost for four days as he tried to be clever going off trail. So off on our walk…we chose to go to the Tajor waterfalls, starting on the lintang traile we walked up to a point where we connected to the tajor trail. The walk wasn’t through beautiful greenery all the way…to challenge you it consists of rugged terrain, steep climbs and generous patches of ‘padang api’. Literally translated as fire fields, these padang api are literally sandstone walks with little or no plant covering overhead so the sun bakes down directly at you from above, its ray also hitting the white sand and bounces back at you from below. I guess you can say even cooking. Some of the people who joined us for our journey, gave up an hour in. But the ‘Padang Api’ did remind me a lot of my neighbourhood where I was growing up, its white sand that compacted to a sort of clay hold little ditches of water with ‘water boatmen’ and other little critters. The padang api did make you very grateful once you’ve reach the trees again though and serve to teach an important message that trees are much required before our planet turns into a massive toaster. Remember Global Warming people! Do your part!! . However, the relieve is short and the long path still ahead will quickly get your legs complaining.

After an hour and a half walk, we are at the waterfall. It isn’t all that big a dip and initially, I was slightly disappointed. This is it? And the water’s black too so it doesn’t really entices you to jump in. But as I sat at the edge with my biscuit and crumbs fell in the water, fighting fishes appeared. They were much bigger but more plainly coloured than the variety you’d find in fish shops but nonetheless it peaked my curiosity. Soon after cooling off sweat…into the waters I go. The black water is not dirty…it’s more or less nature’s tea as it was probably the result of soaked shedding jungle leaves. Soon, I became more adventurous and began exploring the small crevices between rocks and plants…beauty IS in the details. I was more preoccupied photographing than swimming all in all. But, as I was just getting the pleasures of the dip…it’s time to go as pixie was getting worried. It’s already five fifteen pm, and the one and a half hour walk back means it’ll be dark before we finish the trail as it. Having only about 20 minutes in the water, I reluctantly peeled away from it. Along the trail back, rejuvenated from the dip, we took time out to take a classical trick photo couples of the past often did. “Look I found a pixie!” Back to HQ, I was calm with the satisfaction from a good walk. At night bako offers a night walk and fireflies.

Only that night looking through the picture of the waterfall and other pictures I realize nature’s generous beauty. The walk suddenly seemed worth it and I wondered how I’d get pixie to agree to walk in the morning to the waterfall again; she was reluctant only because she wanted to try another trail and also we started late as the fresh chilly forest air was sooooo good to be asleep in…

Post Note. We do well to conserve nature for ourselves and our future. A note from the park ranger said that while Europeans help keep bako really clean, locals are still often caught littering along the trails…sigh… when will we ever learn.




Me, my brother and our grandpa one afternoon at the Star cineplex cinema in kuching after watching Mission Impossible 3 a couple months back. We moved the big cardboard standee into position to get the correct light to take this picture as bemused cinema attendants look on...it's as if we were posing to celebrate some grand premiere... quick...where's Tom Cruise? ahhh...but we've got a bigger star in our midst...who needs tom cruise when you've got... grandpa. My grandpa...from my mother's side is the man who first made me fall in love with cinema and set me on the course to being a filmmaker.

As I had a working mother, my grandpa and grandma was given the task of babysitting me. As I was an overactive kid capable of climbing chairs and an assortment of misbehaviours.Let me give you an example...I once trashed a 'longan'(whitish flesh thumbsized rounded succulent fruit with a brown thin skin) can about hammering it with furniture, throwing it about and kicking it until it leaked because my grandma won't open it for me as she says I have not had lunch. I guess saying was not easy to babysit is an understatement...

Then my grandfather discovered something...in the cinema, i sat stone still watching movies...so every afternoon...babysitting time...it was off to the cinema and hence I grew to love the cinema. Ticket prices were cheap...and he never paid for me as I was supposedly going to sit on his lap...this went on for many years. When VCD came out I watched it at home with kung kung. He was wowed by the special effects of films like titanic and vertical limits swearing that people has to have died to make the film.It's always 'kung-kung kwa he!' (hokkien for Grandpa,lets watch a movie!)

So now when I come home to kuching it's always...I want to bring grandpa to the cinema.But of late, grandpa has been becoming more and more reluctant to go to the cinema...because his hearing and eyesight is failing slowly being 82+...so he doesn't enjoy it as much anymore...he comes up with excuses not to go...i can't drive...I say I will...he says the theatre is cold...I say I'll bring him a jacket and buy him a hot milo...he says he can't hear properly...i say the cinema's very loud and I've already bought the ticket. And so...he comes along...

There is a special something for me when I sit in a dimly lit air-conditioned room with my grandpa watching Mission Impossible 3. I just hope he enjoys it as much...so as we walked out of the cinema...I asked him...how's the movie?...to which he replied...'We've seen it before!

In my heart...i said to myself 'Yes grandpa...we've seen it before!'


It's been at least two months I've been away from this blog...that's how fast life have been passing...anyway,as I return to writing my ongoings...I realised a half written blog that I left behind the last time I was here about two months back...at that time there seem to be such urgency in the issue and yet I didn't really remember to continue and post it...making it ' a post about remembering' all the more significant... being forgotten, being fazed...how life is an ever deepening layer of emotion,stories that were important being covered by layers of silt of everyday ...being eventually forgotten...but stories fading doesn't matter...at least not as much as life's importance fading...what I mean by life's importance's fading is how we tend to forget in the midst of our daily grind the life of those around us (especially those that made us who we are - our families) getting pushed aside due to modern time constraints,geographic logistic and plain old inconvenience.

Anyway...the half written blog...

A week ago I was contemplating not going home for my grandfather's birthday. I was really really up to my neck in work and would want anytime I had away to just crash and the idea of family wasn't on my mind as it takes quite abit to travel.

So I called my dad and asked him how much of a dissapointment it would be if I skipped kung-kung's birthday. My dad asked me if I knew where kung kung was. I said I didn't know. I heard the words kung kung collapsed this morning is now in the hospital's emergency ward. The mere words struck into me and I immediately told my dad I am going home. My dad said to me...no need the urgency...there's nothing we can do but pray...his solemn voice grinded guilt into my heart...

Having someone close to me fall sick really impacts me alot and I get this sudden surge of vulnerability and concern for human mortality/my own mortality that puts me in an immediate solemn and pensive mood. Life, which I often take for granted, will not always be there it seem and I should be screaming with joy that at this very moment that I am here breathing,thinking and writing...you should be screaming too for you are alive, a miraculous creation with breath and spirit reading this.

It's a wonder what we are, a single being formed by a zillion living cells capable of emotions, action, thought and through all these most importantly be an individual...my grandfather was one such individual and though he may not mean as much to many of you out there as he does to me being my grandfather, I do wonder what it really means to me..the words 'my grandfather'...I know I care and love my granfather but why do I? not because he carried the mere words of status 'grandfather' I hope.

So, a man who despite any misgivings or ordinariness is someone who has been directly been invovled in me being here? That would be unfair to my grandfather because he is so much more I am sure...so remember I am trying to do...remember what kung kung has done for me...

Even though I've grown past being a child, I was once held in his arms with great pride being his first grandchild, I remember him sending me postcards for overseas signed with love kung-kung, I remember angpows and presents, I remember his low toned voice of concern for me as I went through exams and with that I remember...my grandfather.

As I came home to be surrounded by family brought together by a time of difficulty, my Auntie Agnes rushed back from Australia and everyone were at their toes...it seems an irony,how family almost require disaster to remember,myself included...
shouldn't we remember on every ordinary day?

Fortunately,my grandfather did pull through this time...and managed to celebrate his birthday despite being weak and on a wheel chair...and as we celebrate...I remember.


just wanted to post this smile of my dear pixie...it melts my heart and I hope it brightens your day in someways too...sometimes we should all smile more...but then not all of us have the ability to flash a nice bright smile...i should be so lucky I have one to see...pixie however is less fortunate...i am one of those who don't smile well...


AELEA story laboratory just shot the profile 'Come Study Here' video for the University of Notthingham. Froggie was directing.We were trying to recreate wonderful moments during university life often unseen on camera that would mirror what is to expected of the Notthingham experience.

It was a very tight schedule as there were many shots to be achieved over a short period of time. Technically, though time was limited,we choose not to go for the easy way out and opted to aim for very complex shots that will be more enticing to the viewer. Jib and dolly tracks, heavy equipment which creates a smooth moving motion for the camera were set up to lend some dynamics to shots giving the imagery life as opposed to all still and silent shot common of mere tripod camera shoots.

Many of the university students came out with bright smiles as being infront of a camera is an escape from a day of hard study. But then many of the talents realised that to evoke very simple everday emotion like a gentle smile or a hearty laugh is much harder than you think when you are in front of the camera and thus acting wasn't that easy as they expected it to be. As director, by hook or by crook I have to induce them into doing the emotions while under the glare of various lights and camera equipments.It wasn't easy as for one shot to be perfect, all the talent had to be good in the shot and the camera movement also had to be timed to capture the moment perfectly. All going well it took only a slight jerk of the camera or one student to look uncomposed to sound the dreaded words...one more time.

The most exciting bits of the shoot were as the basketball court when a different angle of the camera, it behind the transparent net board was odered...by myself. We mounted the camera and I was on a ten foot ladder to capture the moment. Everytime the ball slammed into the board it created such a bang and shook the board so much my heart skipped. But as with any shot, it took take after take and soon i was immune to the slams and also grew unwary of the dangers of my situation then if one of the basket ballers were to be caught in the heat of the game and forget I was there he could have hit the ladder and send me flying.

A different kind of shot from the basketball were slices of nature to highlight the university ample grounds of green and natural surrounds. A shot with a pigeon makes a serene scene that relays this fact perfectly and it is too beautiful visually but as man can't talk to birds or at least the men in this crew can't, it was difficult to get the bird to fly at exactly the right moment and the exact right location.We just had to keep trying. But when a difficult shot finally gets caught on camera the team gets this cheer of satisfaction that's hard to match.

That's a short writeup of our three days of stressful production fun at Notthingham.

Care to train up as a crew? AELEA do accepts hardworking trainees with an intention to learn well the craft of filmmaking so send me a word...but serious ones willing to work hard only.

It has been a crazilly hectic week. On my birthday weekend, 22/23rd April, I spent the whole two days at berjaya times square as my production company AELEA story laboratory working in collaboration with F.E.G. (Film Equipment Gallery) set up a booth at the movie carnival by cinemaonline magazine and my partners in Berjaya Times Square.

The Movie Carnival was not an industry based event(an event for movie industry people) but for the people who support our industry, the movie goers who buys the ticket. So our presence at the carnival wasn't so much to drum up new business or find new collaborative deals but to serve as a booth where the public can interact with actual film equipments to see for themselves how a shot would be achieved on set. The exposure of our company to the public was just a bonus.

We allowed the public to actually operate a full jib and a track setup under close supervision by four trained production crew. Film equipments have many moving parts that could easilly snap a finger off someone...so we kept a close eye to avoid any eeeiiikkksss!!!! followed by gratuitous blood splatter though that be great advertising for some of the horror flicks coming our way.Anyway...back to topic, it would come to many a suprise I think that a rather complex setup is required to shoot a simple scene where a camera moves into a scene from behind some plants and rise above the heads of the actor before titling down to show the audience the scene from an upward view.However though many people passed by our booth...few actually had the inclination to touch and try out...many had eagerly interested eyes but kept their hands wrapped around themselves while peering inquisitively.

Aside from the shooting try out. My company AELEA story laboratory also ran a talent casting session. This is a 'golden opportuinity' for the public to have their profile picture taken and get their details recorded into AELEA database which will be accessed when a shoot; whether a movie, a commercial or a corporate video require talents.If your looks are suitable and you are selected from the database...there's your stepping stone to the screen! AELEA database of talents are also open for access by other production companies.To access...or to be part of the database gimme a call or reach me at aelea.com.my

But before we know it the two days was over...honestly,the movie carnival could have been better but it's a maiden effort with what I would consider a huge turnout so it was successful.And as for what initially seemed like signing up for a torturous two days of sitting and tending to a booth in berjaya times square worked out well and we had alot of fun both with casting and meeting the public to talking among other vendors who popped by with smiles and empty but fun conversations.



Furiously preparing easter eggs for tommorow's celebration? I doubt many of us are...guess easter isn't that marketed yet...it's a good thing to not become part of our rampant marketing culture but we really should hold at high esteem this important event in any christian calendar...

Now at Pixie's house, come over here to help her stay up and do work through the night as her final's next week.It's quite relaxing here...it's an old cottage like house,partially wooden, one storey.the market is only like 100 meters from her house...I ussually come here...go to market with her in the morning and then she'll teach me cooking, then lunch and time to go home...gives me a sense of domestic life in my lifestyle of modern craziness...her family is nice....

Her father is very funny ...

The other day, we were watching the scent of green papaya together...in the film there was a scene of a green papaya being cut revealing white seeds and flesh...her father remarked that this was false...our papayas have black seeds even when unriped...so after the movie at about midnite...we were to do an experiment...she has a papaya tree in the garden but her dad said unapologetically let's not waste our papaya..lets go take the papaya growing outside our neighbour's fence...next thing I know I found myself part of a three member party strecthing out a stick balancing at the side of a drain trying to pluck a green papaya from across a drain, a tree growing outside her nighbour's fence at night...after successfully getting the green papaya...her dad said...might as well pick the ripe ones too....but anyway...the green papaya's seed was white...all white.

....when I am working with her in her room overnight...her father is always peeping up on us at regular intervals to check that nothing's going on....

The other day we slept in the same room but DIFFERENT MATTRESSES altogether and FULLY CLOTHED,DOOR NOT LOCKED..her father freaked out...her mum told her...we chinese are conservative cannot like that one...her dad told her 'cannot stay together afterwards in the heat of the moment cannot control!!'...but the fact of the matter is there is no heat, no moment...she's having an ulcer...no kisses even... :p

So anyway she answered back to her dad, 'So you were like this towards mum when you were dating her?'....her dad immediately quiet down trying to change topic....then her mum who was around added...'he wanted...i didn't allow!' :P

Happy Easter everyone....celebrate it...
Was at church, the veneration of the cross service, a blessed wretched sinner as usual...blessed (i think I've been very in my journey thus far) wretched sinner ( I have not been the epitome of good) but I really want to try to be. Church was solemn but after I felt suprisingly happy...Salvation is there, now we just have to want it..

Everytime in church I feel sorry....I feel very small....sometimes, I honestly do not want to go to church for the reason of feeling unworthy...but my pixie tells me...that's silly...it is you who most need the Lord and the redemption offered by him...

It's very difficult to be a good Catholic today...there are just too many avenue to do wrong and yet I think we are a generation with the most abundance of excesses and convenience...things that we should be grateful for and at the same time wary that it doesn't blur our view off the actual essence of life. I do not kill and neither do I behave like a casanova but I still feel largely inadequate to my faith as a Catholic...



















My darling pixie and I fooling about with a video camera shamelessly at taman tun park by the little stream.....i'd like to say that gardeners were looking on in bewilderment but as I am writing this entry, pixie says 'where got gardeners look...exaggeration....' so yeah...but I am sure if there were gardeners they'd look in bewilderment....

We were making a video trying out for the amazing race....so camera's on...now what to say...how to start????

..very stiff-ly i said..."hi I am Linus...' and then she added I am zhiling...and we started breaking down and becoming more candid...or in other words silly

Having a camera then recording us for the next couple of minutes produced quite an interesting video to look back on in future I am sure, as we just fiddled about being silly and had fun infront of a camera...

... then extracting stills from the video produced interesting and very candid pictures that were a joy to view too especially to ourselves...and maybe to some of our friends....so I heartilly encourage you guys to shoot something just by placing a video camera still on a tripod and then doing silly things infront of it with your love one...later extract stills from it, print it as a photo or montage it into a series....to post on your blog....could be a nice momento for you and your loved one...

Have fun!!!! regards...froggie

HOW to extract stills from video...the easiest non-software way is to just press the photo button on your video camera while playing back your tape....ensure that a picture storage disc is in place though...software way...you could capture the video into a video editing software and then use the export as frame function...do note that some photos extracted from video requires a process called deinterlancing...a filter function in photoshop.
Froggie always like to accompany a post with a picture of somesort on top but blogger's process of having to install picassa to upload photo prohibits me from posting pictures from a cybercafe...so sorry for my absence...need to get back online soon...very inconvenient to get online by driving to a cybercafe...

Anyway,life's hectic for froggie...as usual for an ever hopping froggie...and though sometimes I feel that I am overworked and tired needing rest, I still have this anxious feeling of not doing well enough for my age...so as my insecurities creep up on me I will suddenly feel a gush of 'wanting to do' and being human and only able to do so much sometimes frustrates me...then I need to calm myself....I have so much to do i have so much to do!!!!!!arrrggghhh...there goes my insecurities again!!!!

I guess it's about time I spread out my work...I often have work that do require assistance and I am trying to build a team for a tv show i hope to be launching mid year...yeah so if you are keen on joining this industry...if you have experience...come...if you don't.... intern...but do be serious before you come...don't expect movies = little work + lots of glamour...trust me it lots of HARD WORK!!!!

Also require model looking people to cast in the TV show...and also kids in sarawak wanting to be part of a film....

reebbit!!!!
I will not be able to post regularly for a while despite my new year resolution to post constantly and never again ignore my blog. However, life is as such and as if teasing and testing me a spanner has been thrown into my plans yet again...i've lost internet connection from home.

A buglar broke into my house on Saturday. My back fence got torn down...it is as if king kong robbed me... Taman Tun, froggie's new home and safe haven is unfortunately not as wonderful as froggie first imagined or raved about...it is too sadly cursed to human evils...why thou shall not steal? Well...all other reasons aside, it feels like shit to be stolen from...

I lost quite a significant sum of cash as we were in midst of a production and I was going through budget and my friend still had her angpows at home, a laptop and my passport. But aside from that, I've also lost all my documents,correspondent and photos on my laptop and alot of time to clean up the mess the robbers left. Emotionally, my carefree-ness and feeling of freedom is also lost and in place I have this jumpy worried feeling thinking... thinking when this would happen to me again...now I could be lying in bed at night all tranquil but the slightest sound from downstairs will get me running down to inspect...very very tense nerves...my windows once open for 'rezeki' to come in are now all shut...and it's a little gloomy...

But ah well...life's as such...i hope my nerves loosen up again...all the new hardened steel,cut proof,tamper proof padlocks(yeah right...marketing,marketing) should help and I've subscribed to hourly house checks...Now all there's left is a hope...I hope that all I've lost went to a good cause at the very least, maybe a labourer who needed a laptop he can't afford to buy for his child's education...or a sick wife needing money for medicine...let it not go for drugs...I'll never know but I hope and wish that at the very least as that'll come as a small consolation....lock your doors and keep safe you all...

2 days before the new year...a vet came...he checked my puppy's tooth...then he gave him an injection...it was relatively painless...then he stuck a termometer up my puppy's ass...he(the puppy) yelped! :P Meet my new doggie SPIKE! Happy Doggie Year You All! photos by Aaron Chung

a scene from my upcoming film 'A Letter of Love Again' it is sad how time will pass and these traditional metalwork shops will be gone replaced by bigger machine based industries

Time pass damn fast nowadays, i am busy....so says everybody in the working world and that shall also be my excuse for being away from blogging for ever so long from the month of October till end January...

But my blahing today shall not be about how fast time past and how I do not have enough of it but how time passing is a great big factor and part and parcel of life...I was just in UPWELL about an hour ago...and then I went over to kenyalang; two shopping complexes in my hometown I use to shop in...use to as in... I use to roam about here in search of item of desires by which I empty what little pocket money I have.Places that clothed me in my youth. The supermarket now doesn't look like a place I'll shop in...it's too cluttered, everything placed too closely together and too aunty for my shopping pleasure.But it's fun for me to walk around in it...to reimmerse my self in a past world I use to be in.How time passing brought me away from this world so i can revisit it with a tinge of sweet reminisce...

Between the days of October 2005 and January this year, what did I do? Well in October, I was finalising my move from my student life apartment in Kelana Puteri to my new place in Taman Tun. That came with more trouble than I expected. Moving out of a place that I lived 5 years of my life came as no easy task...I was like going crazy deciding what to throw and what not...yes,I am a compulsive hoarder...and also sorting magazines was an arduous process; I kept coming across articles I wanted to read...but as paying multiple rent(my old place and new) became ridiculous...I guess I had to do it die die...so it became from sorting to moving hordes of junk from one place to another and I did it with two 4 tonne lorries...so my new place was immediately piled with junk...stuff I have not yet sorted as much as i like to sort them before moving...in the middle of the mess I have to come home for a brief moment to bear witness to my Uncle's wedding...then upon returning to K.L. I have the junk to figure out and it's much harder now as the momentum to clean is somewhat drained from the process being overstretched past a quick and painless timeframe...

Also, something was happening on the relationship end of my life...as 'someone'(READ AUGUST 05 BLOG) came in touch with me and I persued her and that took up significant time as well...saying that time passing plays a part in relationships too.When I persued, she was like but we don't know each other long enough...so in this scenario I actually wanted time to pass so that I can say well, we've known each other for X years...can I now date you? geeeessh...girls like to waste time...

So two things cluttering up my life and time is passing, I still have client work to finish...and on top of all this, I was inspired to make a film in Penang called A Letter of Love Again. Making this film independently mean't that I had to write the script, plan,cast, produce, get equipments, get location permits and oversee other tasks.And I had two months as I was shooting in December so yeah...that's what I have been busy with and in this midst of all this pixie said yes...haiihh with a smile...

December came...in a jiff, the month was gone...i had to go to Penang, shoot the film...come home, within a day prepare and go on a trip to Sabah with pixie and company...then back...catch up on work...tried to write my resolutions...clean up my mess which was still there and prepare for new year, missed my dateline of being fully tidy January 1st...nevermind...I'll aim for Chinese New Year aauuggghhhh...
now in the wink of an eye it is already near February and tommorow the eve of chinese new year...and as I type this, a friend just called and I have to go out for supper with him....sounds exasperating? well it is...

Time pass...it part and parcel of life...it has its sweet...I love looking back...I love antiques and nostalgia created by time...but time also limits what we can do and what is done hence why we have to do the most that we can in the time frame given; explaining why even in the midst of crazyness I choose to do my film...because I needed to be creative...needed to be...and also i notice sometimes when we take time passing for granted we end up never doing anything...

make the most of your time passing now...

Me and my very muhibah pensonic friends family...

IT'S CALLED FAMILY

Sorry...have been away from blogging for a long time...how fast a day pass really baffles me...anyway, before going into a blog telling you guys why I have been away, I would like to yap a thing or two on family...

So what's the definition of family? I propose an upgrade of the stoic definition from the old dictionary sitting on my desk(that over simplifies it simply as a household of parents and children or a group descendents of a common ancestor)...now I am not going into stuff like 'All Men under God are one big family' but rather... how family is something that is simply and miraculously created; amongst people who care for one another and like to have the pleasure of being together...

The above picture is of a bunch of friends...the Pensonic friends or should I say my Pensonic family. Over the course of last year, one of my highlights was directing the series of Pensonic commercials you see on TV.Before, I hardly knew any of them and the job started out like any job; in the veins of it being in some ways merely dollar, cents and career progression...Then after finishing work on the commercials, the client Pensonic was so thrilled at the result, they decided to push it into a greater campaign and hence they decided on having roadshows and huge billboards all over malaysia...not forgetting three month airing slots of the commercials on TV.I followed the roadshow events along with the friends who came along as the icing, the client who were the overseeing atms and the crew who set the stage.

But that's not my point...my point is how we evolve into family over time...It's amazing how people start to know one another, at first having to see each other often, a result of working together (hereby not mere serendipity) and then how glances grow into handshake introductions, following into friendship with shared laughter and then dare I call it family with hugs. For some even the handshake introduction is not evident in the scheme. A friend in the Pensonic group, Ken or Superman Ken, is now a close friend to me though I never remembered even shaking his hand at the begining...it started with fleeting introduction during the course of a day's work. Imagine this, I ask Alan,a friend, for something... he tells me to ask Ken for it...as simple as that we are introduced.

Laughter...punctuates the air...hysterical laughter...but what's the joke? Often times the joke repeated isn't funny... though to the person relating...he who was there to hear the joke, it is and very...with the group as we travelled, we occupy time with talk and as we grew comfortable with one another, we dropped our guards...we began to show our little character flaws...began teasing each other about it...people began to carry nicknames...like hamsup uncle and media hoar!!! all said with a tinge of friendly sweet sacarsm...some of us even break into behaving ridiculously for the amusement of the rest of the fami...

So into a 'family' we become...and what fun a family is to be...the below is a picture of my family...half of it, my maternal side...my real family....we had a dinner yesterday, an informal celebration.Some were in the dining hall...others were watching TV, my uncle showed photos from his trip overseas...i was lying in a weird position on a couch lifting my leg high in the air as if somesaulting...my cousin mimicked me...then laughter...i am lucky, the air is seemingly always perpetuated with a loving laugther till the end of the night during my family dinners...much like how it would have been with my other 'family'...so who's to say they are not a real fami...I guess...I'll just say family...

my dear pixie has lots of families too...i admire her for that as much as I envy her..she ends up having little time for me...love you dear....now all that's left, how do I shorten this long winded explaination to become an oversimplified explaination that sits in a dictionary...

To all home with your families this holiday season...good health, god bless and a happy new year....

just a casual dinner with my maternal side extended family
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