Happiness, dissapointments and the process of filmmaking...

If any of you remember me making a post here looking for young boys to act in a film…well…I have been away as I have been working very-very hard fine tuning that film’s script and so far a lot of people whom I have entrusted to read the script as panelists said wonderful things...

…the approach for the quaint feel is good –
Vinsen cinemaonline boss…real world businessman

…touching, though I find it quite hard to believe someone can fall in romantic love at the age of 6..
Rebecca, student and dreamy storybook reader

…good script…now it all depends on how you film it…
Lishen, works in publishing gay man who blogs at jessism.blogspot.com

Yes, they may be trying to cheer me on but I did tell them to be honest…brutally…

But there is still a lot of work to be done…final selection of locations, shots wanted, equipment required and what I can afford…working on a low, low budget as sponsors didn’t want to support the project even though they thought it was a good project…to quote one sponsor in verbatim…

Maybe we will give it a pass this time…You do have the talent and the persistency and you will definitely score…..i am also confident- identity to be left anonymous

Well, one day they’ll support me…and when that day comes the amount will double if not triple because my production scale will go up !

One sponsor actually made it very clear to me why they don’t sponsor…it’s not that they don’t believe in the project but marketing people like brand managers who approve sponsorships… work for a regular pay…they engage an agency to do most of the marketing work and from there…they just tick off on approved agency projects…and should any project fails, they are allright because the agency was engaged by the company, not them…but should they decided to sponsor me…they are putting their heads out on a chopping board…they are trying an untested and untried route…if it succeeds, well good…but they are unlikely to receive any bonuses…however if it fails…they’ll land in hot hot hot soup…so why take the risk and put yourself at a limb? Why not take the safe route and just earn the regular salary? I completely understand this as part of the process but what I didn’t appreciate were company that beat around the bush before giving me the no…thanks to the few that really considered but gave a a straight no…

so yeah…with every rejection a lot of dissapointments and heartaches but well it’s part of my trials …1000 bad bulbs before osram rite? :P Well I am bursting through my bulbs…and would get to the thousand soon…

That’s moviemaking for you…deep downs but also with it great ups….And it's important to have great ups...make sure you balance your deep depression with a good feeling of tipsy high sometimes...

today…I had a surge of happiness exploding within me…I…I … I was swept by what I think I’ll call a sudden well of personal inner joy. It was a wonderful feeling and although alone and having been awake the whole night…I dropped a disc into a CD tray, turned up my hi-fi, sang my hearts out and dance in my most awkward manner myself…sounds crazy…well who cares…I have an overwhelming feeling of happiness! Hahaha. I finished personally drawing the storyboards for the entire film…working every scene out in every detail…what angle I plan to make and how I see everything…

I am very happy with what the film look like on paper myself and I am trying to enjoy myself as much at this moment…soon the quiver inducing process of putting it into camera starts…two weeks to complete preproduction and soon time will come when I ‘ll be painting with my camera…and nervously, I try to hold my brush steady to make a beautiful picture…pray for me or wish me luck…I need all of it!!!